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Good stuffs (videos, links and books)

20:28

One night I accidentally clicked on one Keeping Up with the Kardashian video and YouTube started to assume that I needed to know every bit of their lives. One video played automatically after another. After an hour of uninvited YouTube suggestions, I thought, "Wait a minute, what am I doing? What does their favourite cake flavour having to do with me?" 

I stopped watching their dramas and started digging for good stuffs to watch and read.

After a tough 2017, my goals for this year are to be more financially-savvy, focused and disciplined. Here are some resources that I find extremely useful:

Finance 
This YouTube channel is a gem. I was illiterate when it came to money and accounts, but typical finance books bore me to death. This channel covers multiple topics from budgeting, managing your debts, to practical steps for lifestyle changes. I like that the information they share are very simple and actionable. If you are a newbie like me, you will enjoy their videos.

On focus and discipline 
If there is one man I really want to hang out with, it's Tim Ferriss. I love this guy. He is a prolific writer and speaker, and he produces excellent podcast. I listen to his interviews every time I feel like scrolling Facebook infinitely instead of working. In this episode with the tennis queen, Maria Sharapova, they talk about how important it is to stay focused and disciplined. I write notes about this podcast to remind myself to stay focused whenever I start watching random cat videos.

Goal setting 
I don't know about you but I'm not good in making plans and thinking ahead. Plans can be pretty daunting and abstract to me. What I do is I imagine what I want to achieve and start drawing the map backwards. Most of the time whiel I'm making plans, I'll start to doubt myself if I can really achieve them and think if I'm too unrealistic. Fear paralyses me. 
Then I heard about this Ten-Year Plan exercise from Tim Ferriss. I guess you’ve heard of vision board, this exercise is similar to that. It's pretty simple and straightforward. Basically you picture your life in ten years' time and write down every single detail of that vision, without holding back and any fear. Once you have the ideas on paper, they are less imaginary and more plausible. And you are more likely to reach those goals.
I totally agree with this concept. You will naturally navigate towards what you want, so it is better to get that picture crystal clear.


These books are very helpful too.

Personal Development

The Magic of Thinking Big – David J. Schwartz
This book encourages you to think beyond your current status quo, and it guides you on how to rethink your life and strive for excellence. One part I find extremely useful is the three failure diseases: procrastination, excuse-itis and detail-itis. I am guilty of all three. Now I tend to catch myself in the midst of them and think "Gotcha! Stop that."
Good quote: “The thinking that guides your intelligence is much more important than how much intelligence you have.”

Living the 80/20 Way – Richard Koch
I guess you've heard of the Pareto Law or the 80/20 principle, I find it interesting but not exactly sure how to apply this into my daily life. This book gives you clear examples and tactics on how to design a life that you enjoy. What I like about this book is how easy it is to read and understand.

Lean In: Women, Work and The Will to Lead – Sheryl Sandberg
A friend recommended me this book because she knows that I'm a quiet and non-confrontational introvert, with the hope that Sandberg's stories and career path will inspire me to think far and aim high. Conventional social expectations on women are still very common, but the dynamic is shifting. This popular book deserves all the attention it gets. I see myself in some of the cases in the book where women are afraid to speak up and defend themselves.
Good quote: “What would you do if you weren't afraid?” I think I'll be a cool kid.

Biographies

Paths of Glory – Jeffrey Archer
Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail – Cheryl Strayed
These two books are the best of the bunch. They talk about two incredible journeys - one to the Mount Everest and another one to the Pacific Crest Trail in the US. Both authors are incredible story-tellers, so the readers are instantly drawn to follow them to the wild nature, adventures, and the most impressive of all, the inner struggles along the way. The two books are so different in their plots, but essentially they talk about the journey of conquering a challenge and the determination to complete their quests. I highly recommend these books to anyone who is battling a long fight, such as paying the house loan or attending graduate school. 

Business

Purple Cow: Transform Your Business by Being Remarkable – Seth Godin
Seth Godin is one of my mentors, though I've never met him before. His views on business, education and management are so in-depth and realistic. This is a short book which you can finish in an afternoon, without much business principles or complicated hacks in it, but his arguments got you thinking, "What makes something impressive and another mediocre? What makes a person unique and another average?" Think of a purple cow in the midst of brown cows - it's remarkable.


Most of these books have audio books that you can download on Audible or YouTube. In addition to that, I wrote a post about my favourite podcasts – I still listen to them when I am driving or working. Hope you find this post useful. Have a productive year ahead!

Beijing Photo Diary

00:02

Seventeen years ago I boarded my first flight to the capital of China. Everything in Beijing fascinated me as a child: the large Tiananmen Square, the grand Forbidden City, the infinite Great Wall, the people who hadn't heard about Malaysian Chinese, and the public toilets with no doors.

Fast forward 17 years later, there I was again, standing at the Temple of Heaven (Tian Tan) and feeling ecstatic because this was my favourite place.

Her magnificent scenery and incredible history never cease to amaze me. But what amaze me even more is how much Beijing has developed over the last two decades. China has risen indeed.

On the last day of our trip, I looked at my parents, my siblings, and suddenly thought, life's good.

My parents are both alive and well. My siblings are close together. We laughed a lot. We managed to save money and travel together. We loved Beijing. We had a good time. I'm aware that this does not happen to many families.

I shared this grateful sentiment with Frederick and he said I'm a lucky person. His last family trip was 20 years ago when he was a child. Although he really wish to travel with his whole family again, it's almost impossible.

Beijing was amazing, but spending time with my family was even better, especially when we snuggled together, trying to keep warm at -7°C. 

May you spend more time with your family.


Little me at the Great Wall, 31st of May 2001

Trying to look at the good sides and laugh... 2017 rewind

23:45

What better day to look back at your year than the midnight of Christmas Eve? The night is peaceful at 3 a.m., I'm scribbling my random thoughts, good and bad moments of the year on my notebook. Some of these notes are funny and stupid, some sound smart, some are shitty, and some should never be seen by anyone else.

I do this every year to recap what I have, or have not accomplished, what I'd done, and what I wish that I'd done differently. And then I try to reflect on them and plan for the new year. If you've never tried this before, I suggest that you get a piece of paper and pen, and doodle whatever comes to your mind about 2017. You'll be amazed by your own stories. This exercise is useful because it tells you so much about yourself. I can't describe my emotions now. I'm feeling entertained, surprised, regretful, sorry, happy,  and funny. 

Then I decide to distill my pages of notes into something useful and shareable.

Three things I've learned in 2017:

1. Know your money.

I think you don't grow up until the defining moment when you smack your forehead after looking at your bank accounts. I was (and still am) financially illiterate, so when terms like "loans", "savings", "bills" hit me like a tsunami this year, I felt more motivated than ever to look at the numbers and understand them. My income as a grad student was indeed minimal, but honestly the main problem was because I didn't make wise decisions for my finances.

If I were to do ONE thing differently since the beginning of 2017, it'd be to educate myself more about money.  I'm starting slow by reading more about the topic now.

2. You need to clean your own mess.

Sometimes you get into troubles where nobody can help you except yourself. This might happen to your career, family, finance, or relationship. I think I wasn't mature enough realize that I have to take full responsibility for every choice I make. Every single decision you make will come back to you. So make your decision wisely.

3. Are you really suffering? In your imagination or reality?

I made a full list of my current problems, what might be the worst scenario and what I could do to minimize the consequence. The results were shocking. I see that I have the tendency to overthink, over-worry and over-commit. I worry all the time about scenarios that will not happen. (Reference: Tim Ferriss' TED talk).

Taking my financial problem as an example, I was worried that my scholarship would be delayed and I might need to work as a tuition teacher, a job that I really dreaded. I was thinking all these problems with students, my time management, tedious preparation, expectations and transport. Once I listed down all these problems on paper, I was able to analyze them and come up with better ideas to solve the problems.

--

While these points may seem blandly obvious to the clever people, it took me nearly three decades to see what I had done wrong. I guess a good lesson is better late than never.

Okay, enough of the grandmother's story. Since everybody only shares his or her best moments on the internet, here are some of my best moments this year:

Stuck in the toilet because the lock was broken. Luckily I was agile enough to magically climb up and move to another cubicle. Although I wish you never have to go through this physical challenge, I think we should all be prepared for unexpected circumstances because you just never know. I can' stop laughing hahahaha. Documentation by Poh Kheng.
Midnight picnic on the grass in Dataran Merdeka to celebrate Yiing Yee's birthday. Not fancy but very romantic and memorable.
Completed several projects with this guy. I don't know how we managed to do those things despite our crazy schedule. By the way, Avoon is single and he can bake delicious cakes.
Worked with a new group of people for Heartbiz, a platform which promotes virtuous businesses. It's an eye-opening experience. Photo by Kuar Photography.
Foster relationship that's worth my time, especially my family.

You cannot make everyone happy. Care less and relax.

Kluang Railway Station. Didn't know that Fred is good in taking my photos. One brownie point for him.

I'm Einstein's little experiment. This was in a 3D art museum in Langkawi. Rethinking the purpose of doing research and pursuing scientific knowledge, and my career path.

Tried to look into the beauty of full concentration and artistry in science. This was a corner of my friend's geology laboratory.

It says "The real perfection includes accepting your own weakness and dark side." Learned to accept that perfection will never exist. And, the process is the result.

A huge rain tree in Melaka. Got healed from a really desolate relationship, but I know I had to go through it to learn and break some of my die-hard insecurities.



Started to think that bathing and cleaning my grandma's diaper are easy-peasy. She has Alzheimer's disease and couldn't remember anything or take care of herself.

Learned a lot of unexpected new skills, such as playing with a glass prism to create rainbow and selling them on e-commerce.

MRT started its operation. This was taken at the station right at my housing area. The world is changing, am I?

Sekeping Jugra. Later that day I jumped into the pool to chill after a few glasses of wine. Photo by Qiu Ying.

7 a.m. in Putrajaya, just magical. Photo by Fred.

Chilled at The Andaman Resort in Langkawi. That was probably the most relaxed moment I had in the entire year. Photo by Fred.

Seeing your old friends unlocking a milestone is a strange feeling. You keep wondering "Where did the time go?" "What have I done?" and feeling ecstatic for them at the same time.

Good friends, good times, good food and wine. And a film camera. No extra word needed. Photo by Pei Han.

Witnessed my childhood best friend's wedding. Seriously I did not realize I am not young anymore until that exact moment when she said "I do".

Work in an environment that expands my horizons and trains me in so many ways. Photo by Kok Keong.

Probably one of my favourite shots of the year. There is no need for excessive display of intimacy in one photo to show the bond between two human beings. Photo by me.

Learning new skills is a must. You might need it one day. 

Always look at the good side of things with a pinch of humour. Being angry and revengeful will not solve any problem, ever.

Drinking white wine at the Fullerton Bay Hotel in Singapore. This seems to be extremely romantic, but the truth is I'd been hiding inside a hotel room writing all day for a deadline, pulling my hair, and feeling overwhelmed. Everyone is struggling a struggle you have no idea about, there is no need to compare. This realization, I think, is the most important one I had this year.

All in all, my year was incredibly busy and amazing. It wasn't easy at all, but it was a year of growth and incredible memories.

I am always curious who actually read this blog. I want to say thank you for dropping by, and I hope you continue to learn, grow, and have a fruitful year ahead.

With my very best wishes,
Eve

Growth and comfort... can I have both?

16:35

I don’t usually go for outdoor challenges, but when I do, I crawled into a pitch-black million-year-old cave and looked for fossil (pictured above). It was fascinating.

My friend was recently dismissed by her company. She was heartbroken. Five long years of loyalty, endurance and midnight oil didn’t help to secure the job after all. She thought if she worked hard enough, she’d stay and work in the same company until retirement, she’d climb the career ladder and become the retail manager.

The company that she desperately wanted to stay is a family-owned (not her family) business. Based on her description, the business has a complicated but vague organizational structure which consisted mainly of family members (Hint: relentless family dramas). The business also doesn’t seem to expand in the near future. Benefits, salaries and opportunities were average. 

So why does she want to stay? She feels that she understands the company and its daily operation. She knows all her colleagues. She could pay the bills and save up to travel abroad every year. She feels secure. 

“It’s been five years and you’re doing the same job day after day, and you've been mingling with the same group of people all the time. Of course you’ll move to a new job!” another friend said. He was trying to put things in a bigger perspective and convince her that this is a good chance, not an unfortunate event, to explore better opportunities. 

“I know, but where can I go? It’s difficult to get a new job AND adapt to a new environment. I am already 30 years old, you know?!” she sighed. Honestly, I don’t know - is age really the limiting factor? If she were to retire at 60 years old, she still has thirty years ahead of her. Thirty years of possibilities, think about that.

"Are you really okay with what you're doing? Is that what you really want?" he asked. She did not answer.

After crawling inch by inch on the muddy floor, we were covered with sweat and marveled at a small water pond inside the cave.
I am filled with one thousand insecurities, I like shortcuts and I don't like to change too, but life has taught me this lesson in a hard way: a comfortable decision is almost always, not the right decision. Option A might bring you a sense of predictability and security, but it doesn’t mean that this is the right thing to do, both in short-term and long-term. You might want to go for option B which makes you feel slightly uncomfortable but produce a better outcome. 

To change and grow doesn't mean that we need to shift your life course entirely - migrate to Europe, learn German and dye our hair blonde. What I mean is don't be rigid, define and limit ourselves too early. The best thing usually happen when you do something out of your usual habit, maybe some random act, you'll  pleasantly surprised by the new perspective that you gain. What if you eat lunch alone? Take a new route back home? Chat with the cashier when you pay? Walk into Starbucks and ask for a cup of free water? You can’t suddenly have the courage to make a big change if you don’t practice small changes frequently. Step out of your comfort zone, one small step at a time.

My workplace is filled with government servants who have been working in the same department or position for decades. They have very stable income and secure retirement plan, which is great especially for parents who have mouths to feed and debts to pay off. They face little to no career adversities so they seem pretty happy. This sounds great, but I can't help but wonder if this lifelong commitment to one paycheck is worth it.

When you decide to stay in the status quo and avoid all risks, you’re already taking the greatest risk. At the grand scheme of the world, everything is changing - technology, culture, job prospect, finance, economy. At the personal level, we face money, relationship, health, emotions and physical environment issues. If you don’t change and grow, how can you possibly adapt?

Alice in the Wonderland is a good metaphorical and philosophical story that I really like. She was curious enough to jump down the rabbit hole, and the adventure began. If we could just be a tiny bit more curious, maybe our lives will be a tiny bit more interesting?


Further reading:

1. Never be comfortable: https://impossiblehq.com/never-be-comfortable/
2. 3 Reasons Your Comfort Zone is Killing You (and How to Beat It): https://www.goalcast.com/2017/08/22/comfort-zone-killing-you-how-to-beat-it/
3. 100 Weird, Easy and Interesting Ways to Expand Your Comfort Zone: https://heykendra.com/100/
4. Growth and comfort, they don’t co-exist

Fall. Get back up.

21:17
Grace (right) and I. Photo by Frederick.
Grace was my university roommate, and the first person outside my family that had to stay with me. The first few months must be a petrifying experience for the both of us. The sandy floor, my dirty laundry and unwashed coffee mug, her continuous stream of boring Taiwanese dramas and smelly stuffed toy... not cute. Anyway she braved through the years she had to stay with me, which on hindsight, I believe, provided her good training to survive her six years of graduate school.

Graduate school (or grad school) is a place where people attend to receive advanced academic degree, for the noble pursuit of knowledge, curiosity and passion. In short, our job is to ask a good question, find the solution and answer the question.

As glamorous as it might sound, grad school is also a place where adults fail, crawl and cry like a baby. Statistics show that many grad students suffer from chronic anxiety and depression. One article's title is particularly 'refreshing', it's called How academia made me the most depressed I’ve ever been. How alarming!

For years Grace encountered every possible failure a grad student could ever imagine. Rejections happened from time to time, inequality was a norm, misunderstanding and miscommunication were common, failure was inevitable. Besides these natural culture of the academia, there were also other challenges in her life. She might kill me but I'll write here anyway - some dreadful relationship issues, serious impostor syndrome, language barrier, low self-esteem, lack of confidence, no scholarship, no money... All in all, it was a super challenging period in her life.

The most painful times of our lives are also the turning points that we grow and learn the most. That dreadful relationship became her good wake-up call for self-love and respect. That financial problem forced her to step out of her comfortable, yet toxic, environment and moved into the corporate world. That language barrier was solved naturally as she was pushed to communicate with strangers every single day.

Today she is pretty and good.

Someday you will look back and understand why it all happened the way it did. It might seem like a stupid mistake at the time, but it will be a lesson of a lifetime.
Grace curated a beautiful box of good stuffs for my birthday in October.

I am writing like a smart-ass here, making some cheesy-sounding comments on hindsight, but I know somebody might need to read this today. I am writing this post today because my other friend S, is having her low point and I know she reads this blog. She is extremely worried and anxious. I hope she will see that something in her life needs to be changed, and she can do it.

Life is hard, it will keep throwing curve balls at you. Don't stand still and sigh. Hit it. 

-- Eve x

How do you eat an elephant?

19:51
Anxiety is not good for you. Joy is.
My last published blog post was four months ago, another ten drafts have been sitting in my computer for years. I really couldn't find time to do it. It's hard to articulate to people who don't live with me how busy I am. My calendar is full and I'm constantly hustling. I have a full time job, participate in an NGO and work on some side projects as well. There are so many times I feel nauseous and think I couldn't take it anymore.

I tried many methods to manage my time and productivity, e.g. Pomodoro timer, different productivity planners suggested by different websites, bullet journal, Evernote etc. Currently the method I am using is an integration of Google Calendar and bullet journal. They have been extremely helpful to me.

But you know what, tools are secondary. Mindset is primary.

When you are occupied by tasks and deadlines, it is so easy to feel overwhelmed and anxious. And those are the traps. These feelings suck away most of your energy and make you feel restless. Instead of focusing on the solution, you experience shortness of breath, headache and impatience. Have you experienced this before? When a deadline is drawing closer, you find it difficult to sit still, you pace around the room, you play with your fingers, instead of working on the task itself.

In times of challenges and stress, it is even more important to stay focused and relaxed, and focus on the task, not the emotions. Recently I witnessed a leader having a nearly breakdown moment because of a tight deadline. Trapped in the emotional whirlwind, she pulled everyone with her in the storm of anxiety and restlessness. And the result was not great. If she would just take a step back, break tasks into smaller ones, focus on the single task at hand and don't let emotions distract her, the outcome would have been so much better.

This is a quote that is now constantly playing in my head.
The best way to eat an elephant is one bite at a time.
Personally a big part of my anxiety and feeling overwhelmed by deadlines is because I am a VIP - Very Impatient Person. I always want to get things done in the shortest time possible and ask for perfection. This is utterly impossible and I am only making my own life difficult. Being anxious and worried will not help the situation at all, and it will not miraculously make you more time to solve anything. So, one bite at one time. You will eventually finish the beast.
Beautiful illustration by Melissa Washburn
Life is a marathon, not a sprint. One step at one time.

I'm inspired by Seth Godin who has been writing daily and sharing his work publicly in the past decade. I resonate with this paragraph in this post so much:
If you know you have to write something every single day, even a paragraph, you will improve your writing. If you're concerned with quality, of course, then not writing is not a problem, because zero is perfect and without defects. Shipping nothing is safe.
And this applies to every single task. This applies to every single craft and mastery in this world too. Start small. Move inch by inch.

-- Eve x

Babe, you got serious impostor syndrome

22:29

Miss A had been frowning through the whole dinner. Her boss wanted to transfer her from Department X to Department Y, which unfortunately she hated. She spent almost an hour explaining to us why she didn’t agree with the stupid decision. She was furious and disappointed, but helpless. Nothing could ever be done to help this damsel in distress. “Why am I so unlucky? Why me?!”

Miss A wanted to go Department Z, which not only aligned with her values, but also the best AND the most challenging of all. After almost an hour of ranting and frowning, we said, “Why don’t you tell your boss your real intention?” She frowned again, “It’s impossible, she wouldn’t listen. Plus - I’m not good enough, Department Z is probably not going to want me either. I’m lousy and bad. I’m stupid. Why am I so unlucky?” The rant about her boss becomes a rant about herself. Unable take the rant anymore, I grabbed her phone and WhatsApp her boss, listing down the reasons why she needed - not wanted - to go to Department Z instead of Y. After I hit the Send button I was a bit anxious too, because she was anxious. This was the first time she went against her boss, the very first time she spoke up and let her voice be heard.

Guess what? The boss replied, “Great. I’ll talk to Department Z.” Today she is happily growing in Department Z.

Miss B is in a new working environment, so of course there are a lot to be shared in our dinner gathering. She has an interesting habit while narrating her story. “I’m not happy in my office, maybe it’s my problem you know. I’m such a socially-awkward person, I’m not good at this and that, so when my colleagues… The other day I was so terrible, I guess I’m just useless, I accidentally… My boss was strict, I think I can never live up to that standard. I’m really slow in learning…” Every story begins with a description, a bad one, of herself. Before she even narrated the story, she already exuded an impression that she is the worst and dumbest human being ever lived. Knowing her for years, we broke down each story and kept telling her it’s not her fault, but it seemed like all these encouragement and positivity couldn’t pull her out of the story she told herself – that she is bad.

So after reading the true stories of Miss A and B, can you spot a pattern? They both think they are the worst, they are not good enough - not good enough to speak, to be heard, to perform, and to go after what they want. So they surrender. They passively take in everything while in their heart they are opposing everything.

I’m writing like it’s a sin to feel that way, somemore I nosily grabbed Miss A’s phone and texted her superior. I’m so cool, calm and ballsy.

Ha, nope. I’m one of them.

Guess why I didn’t write on this blog for so long? Because some people came up to me and told me they read my blog and they liked it. THEY LIKED IT?! NO NO NO NOBODY SHOULD BE READING THIS  Thanks for the compliment, but if you think, well great yeah, that should motivate me to write. Well hell no, I used to write freely, but now I have vivid impressions that SOMEONE out there is reading my blog. They might be judging me. They might pick on my grammar or vocabulary, my friends might think I’m such an attention-seeker, my peers might think I’m too free, my boss might be thinking I’m wasting my time.... These things haunt me. If you are that kind of person who are seldom seen in the public and you are suddenly the center of attention, the feeling of being naked and exposed is very crippling and suffocating.

It is only recently that I know that this feeling has a name – Impostor syndrome.

Impostor syndrome is “a belief that you’re an inadequate and incompetent failure, despite evidence that indicates you’re skilled”. It is “at heart a social anxiety, drives those who suffer from it forward; insecurity, on the other hand, tends to make people shy away from taking risks.” This is not uncommon.

What are the symptoms of impostor syndrome? How do you know if you suffer from it? This article is really useful. Here’s a snippet of it:

1. When People Praise You, You Fear You Won’t Live Up To Their Expectations. Instead of internalizing their praise and really taking it in, your knee-jerk emotional response is to feel ashamed and unworthy (me).

2. You Feel Your Success Is Due To Luck. Even though you got good grades in school, beat out many competitors to land this job, and may have even received raises and promotions, you nevertheless feel that your success thus far is accidental, not earned.

3. You’re Afraid Others Will Discover How Little You Know.

4. When You Succeed, You Have Doubts About Being Able To Do It Again. Like number 2, above, you have a feeling that every small triumph you achieve was accidental. Putting feelings aside for the moment, if you think about it rationally, you’ll realize that a lot of hard work and preparation led to your success.

5. You Believe Others Are More Intelligent Than You. Everyone is intelligent in a different way. Stop measuring yourself in such a limited (and inaccurate) way.

6. If You’re Up For A Promotion, You Don’t Tell Anyone Until It’s A Done Deal. You project your fears onto others. Why would you be up for a promotion if those above you didn’t think you deserve it?

7. You Feel You Have To Work Harder Than Others. *Unrealistic perfectionism*

8. You Always Have A Backup Plan Ready In Case You’re “Discovered.” Successful people who talk about their impostor syndrome report that they have an internal monologue that goes something like this, “If this job doesn’t work out, I can always teach/start a business/go back to school.” In other words, they can’t really believe that this good situation can last.

9. You Seek External Validation, Yet Don’t Fully Believe It When It Comes. It’s good to be humble in the face of major recognition, such as an article written about you or a company-wide announcement that your sales numbers were highest. But people with impostor syndrome can’t always hear what others say about them and just allow themselves to feel unabashedly proud.


10.  You Keep Your Real Life—Upbringing, Degrees, Etc.—Secret From Peers. Some people would be proud that they were the first person in their family to graduate from college, but for you, it’s a badge of shame—something that makes you different from those around you. If you looked closer, however, you’d probably find that others attended ordinary schools, or got Bs, or had to overcome some kind of challenge to get where they are. Stop making generalizations about your peers that are simply not true.

Women, especially, experience impostor syndrome. They “may be less willing to put themselves forward, feeling that they are not qualified.


Source
You might think that impostor syndrome is lacking self-esteem and confidence. Yes but I will add one more part to that – impostor syndrome is lacking self-esteem and confidence, but having too much ego, that you are too protective of your comfort and unwilling to be open, vulnerable and take a leap. I’ll write more about my experience with this concept, that is of course, if I overcome the impostor syndrome and I’m willing to share my writing with you again…….

Our society generally prefer people, or children who are obedient and quiet, and despise people with strong opinion or ask question. Personally, I think it will take me a while to undo that mindset. It’s a mind habit that I am too accustomed to, that sometimes if I do something brave I will surprise myself. But something seen cannot be unseen, being aware of it is the first step to improve. I will care my syndrome with patience and care. You can also read this good article to know how to overcome impostor syndrome.

So after reading thus far, are you experiencing impostor syndrome? Or do you know anyone who is?
 
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